I've had my last glass of wine... My last non-relevant carbohydrate... My last tastes of pork and red meat... And my last drop of coffee... Oh! And sugar!... For three weeks.
The Liver Detox begins tomorrow.
The inflammation in my body will be treated with restricted diet, and I will come out the other end of these 21 days a magical and gorgeous unicorn with glistening hair and eyes... And will have magical powers to manifest the most gorgeous clothes and shoes on a whim... As well as command that it only ever rain in San Diego at night, so that I may enjoy full Sunshine during each day. Kittens and puppies will run up to me everywhere I go. I will be able to go back in time to prevent George Lucas from every creating Jar Jar Binks or casting Hayden Christensen, as well as prevent the utter shit-tasticness that is the alleged "Jem" movie.
That is the power of a detox, yes?
Well, it better eff-ing be, because I am giving up coffee, people. COFFEE!!!
Anyway. In place of coffee will be green teas and kale smoothies to start my day. And each night, I will end it with a concoction of freshly grated turmeric root and ginger warmed in coconut milk.
Why turmeric and ginger?
Well... Ginger, as most people know, is lovely for digestion. It tastes good too. Especially when it is fresh. It's clean and snappy. Turmeric tastes clean too. But that's not so much why it is included. No, it's because it is good for inflammation and a whole host of other things.
I simply grate a little 1-inch knob from each root...
And dump it into a small warming pan with a cup of coconut milk, stirring it.
Turmeric is powerful in color. It can stain. But it turns the milk a lovely shade of buttery yellow when the heat has released it...
And it's then ready to consume.
A magical elixir that I know will turn me into the world's most fabulous unicorn with magical powers.
It simply has to.