Arriving Into The Medicine World Space.

The Medicine World is a place in which I immediately felt at home. We were introduced nearly 18 months ago, and we've kept in touch and visited each other over and over again. Not just in person. Sometimes we connect as friends do on Facetime or over the phone.

The day after my arrival into Iquitos found me sitting down in a rocking chair in the same ceremony house from that initial time. The new Blue Morpho Camp, established last fall off of the Amazon River, had suffered some damage from the heavy rainy season in April. And we were moved back to the original camp, which suited me quite fine. It was more rustic. I felt more connected to my experiences from the first camp than the second. And sitting in the rocking chair, waiting for the first ayahuasca ceremony to begin, I knew this new week's set of ceremonies would be the most transformational for me yet.

"Life is really, really confusing," Malcolm, the Maestro Shaman leading the group, said. "In that confusion comes the clarity. Without confusion, the clarity takes you down a path that stops."

So life isn't meant to be easy. It's never clear all of the time. We're meant to process and go through confusion to arrive at where we need to truly be. To determine what we truly want.

Surrendering completely to that chaos, acknowledging it, and processing the confusion is part of our personal evolutions.  It's how we decide who we are. And the plant medicine (ayahuasca, sanango, san pedro, etc.) help us process these things.

"I'm prepared to go deeper," I said to myself. "I'm asking the medicine to strop away the things I don't need. Tonight I want cleansing. Show me what isn't serving me. What am I holding on to. Burn away my fear and anxiety."

The light outside was fading fast. My toes had each found their familiar places on the wooden board flooring beneath me. My pinky toes knew how to rock my whole body back and forth in the chair. It was nearly time.

"I am here."