Bikram 101: "F*ck Yoga."

It's a combination of things...

The annoyance of the man himself producing videos complaining about the teacher trainings others are producing... The teachers I've encountered giving incredibly bad advice on postures to students and myself... The mileage I am racking up on my car by having to divert a few miles towards the coast a few nights in order to hit a class in time... The fact my menstrual cycle has elongated as a result of my hormones being toyed with every day because of my heated class I need to get to...

But towards the end of this week, I had one simple text to send to my closest confidant about my 101-day hot yoga challenge...

Yes. Fuck yoga.

I am over it.

Not over yoga. I really enjoy practicing. But after 85 classes into this 101-day challenge, I am over the whole thing.

And so, I decided to quit. The challenge, that is. Not the yoga practice.

"I'm proud of you," said my confidant. "You shouldn't do it just to do it."

It was the end of the work day. I had just bought a large bottle of Fiji water to take to class. But as I walked to the garage at work, I was just too exhausted. I was not in the mood for yoga. I wanted to go home, drink a glass of wine, broil myself a filet mignon and asparagus, and then take a bubble bath to lull myself to sleep.

Speaking of baths, one of the things that I developed an even greater appreciation for was long soaks in the tub.

I just didn't have time for them anymore.

I was doing so much yoga... By the time I got home at the end of the day, around 9pm, I was only in the mood for a quick shower. And dinner - guiltily - was almost always a chicken Cantina burrito from Taco Bell.

I didn't have time to make myself something to eat.

And while I could see that my limbs were leaned out - especially my arms - I was retaining water badly in my belly.  I hadn't lifted weights much in over two and a half months - since my trainer moved back to Australia and I started this challenge.

And my hair...

I'd been wearing it pulled back and in a bun so much, rarely finding the energy or need to actually fix it after showering...Why bother? When it was just going to get wet again.

And eye makeup!!!

I hadn't worn it in eons! (In real time, about two months.)  I could never get it completely off before class, and would end up looking like a total Tart-Whore-Trashy-Chelsea-Hotel-circa-1978 after class.

Baths. Weights. Hair. Eye makeup. Real food.

I wanted it all.

And so, I ended my yoga challenge.

And am very happy about it.

I'll go to yoga tomorrow for the first time in a few days. I'll be a normal person. I'll approach my practice with the intention of bring some healing to my body... Not as someone who needs to just make it to the end of class to rack up another "X" on her chalkboard wall, counting up to 101.

I'm never doing one of these again.

Or at least trying to do one of them again.